mercoledì 14 maggio 2008

DOPPIA PAGINA, DOPPIO SPETTACOLO.


Sono 10 minuti che sono fisso sulle pagine 4 e 5 di Vaniti Fer e non riesco ad andare avanti. Ci provo a girare ma non ci riesco. Per quanto mi riguarda la rivista questa settimana poteva anche risparmiarsi le restanti 340 pagine, con buona pace degli alberi risparmiati.
Macchè articolo sulle contro olimpiadi di protesta che faranno in Tibet. Chi se ne frega di quattro monaci che sbraitano, tanto sempre preti sono e poco cambia che ti rifilino la storia della reincarnazione invece di quella del paradiso (che poi se tanto mi da tanto io al massimo posso aspirare di rinascere in un bigattino da pesca). Qui c’è una doppia pagina dedicata a Bicchenberg, la casa di moda iper testosteronica che usa la propria squadra di calcio come specchietto per le allodole per vendere mutande che costano quanto una cena per 4 alla Pergola dei Cavalieri Ilton e maglie coatte che in confronto la linea di Corona sembra disegnata da Fausto Sarli.
Insomma sto piantato qui davanti a questi 11 manzi, tutti in mutande con le mani dietro le schiene, sguardo perso nel vuoto e posizione di “colui che attende” (per favore, non chiedete cosa che non voglio essere volgare).
Insomma ci sono più dossi tra le gambe di questi calciatori che su sulle montagne di Gardaland e Mirtabilandia messe insieme, con la differenza che se ci fai un giro non ti viene la nausea ma ti rimetteresti subito in fila per provarle di nuovo.
Come quando uno fantastica su “che cosa ci farei con un milione di euro?”, io sto mentalmente giocando al mio gioco mentale preferito da me stesso brevettato: “che cosa ci faresti in una suit d’albergo insieme a loro che sono sì etero, ma non vedono una donna da…facciamo 2 anni e, facendosi reciprocamente schifo, visto che sono appunto super etero, sfogheranno su di te le pulsioni sessuali represse da così tanto tempo?” (tranquilli, ho venduto i diritti e tra poco il gioco uscirà per Nintendo DS e PSP).
Non so se vi capita o vi capiterà di vedere la campagna pubblicitaria o se già avete smesso di leggere per precipitarvi in edicola ma qui l’imbarazzo della scelta non c’è affatto: dove caschi, caschi benissimo. Qui siamo a dei livelli che mediamente se ti dicono di imbracciare una mitraglia e sterminare una classe di bambini all’asilo nido per ottenere in cambio di giocare a farfallina co’sti boni, tu pensi che tanto anche Erode ha fatto lo stesso è non è cascato mica il mondo quindi...
Io comunque il mio preferito ce l’ho. Sarà che dopo Madre Tersesa e Rita Levi Montalcini il mio punto di riferimento è sempre stato Rizzo di Gris che se la faceva con il capitano della squadra di futbol, ma io opterei per quello con la fascia bianca al braccio con su scritto C.
Un ultima cosa, per favore, adesso non ve ne uscite con il fatto che quei corpi sono frutto di ore di fotosciop invece che di mesi d’allenamento sui campi (se hai il corpo di una busta di plastica gonfiata dal vento stai fresco a disegnare addominali e quadricipiti) ne, tanto meno, fate gli ipocriti come la mia collega che ha appena detto che a lei “non ci trovo nulla di così fantasctico” (è anche vero che poi è arrivato un cane lupo con una croce bianca disegnata sulla pettorina e l’ha portata a fare una passeggiata).
PS per gli adepti di Vaniti. Io in basso a destra avrei scritto: tempo di lettura: 2 giorni.

67 commenti:

Anonimo ha detto...

tempo di cottura: 15 secondi.

Ale e Edu ha detto...

Solange! ti ordino di abbandonare subito il corpo di Insy!!!!

Anonimo ha detto...

Effettivamente mister C ha un qualcosa in più (un po' come mister B di Carrie)
Ma soprattutto, quando gli hanno fatto la foto, quale eccitante gli hanno somministrato?? Sono tutti in erezione!!!!!

Anonimo ha detto...

Ho appena cliccato sulla foto. Ho... diciamo le pupille dilatate, va'.

Anonimo ha detto...

E pensare che a me stamattina, in palestra, hanno lasciato nell'armadietto una copia omaggio di Glamour; ma che me ne devo fare?! Corro a comprare vanity!
Sono argomenti che meritano approfondita lettura.

Mirko

Anonimo ha detto...

Insy, mi arrivi tardi: è roba vecchia di alcuni mesi... Se però vuoi farti un cultura calcistica c'è il sito ufficiale della squadra: FC Fossombrone

Anonimo ha detto...

Qualche giorno fa nelle vetrine della Rinascente in Duomo a Milano, c'era la stessa pubblicità: solo che era a proporzioni ...ENORMI! Ho steso un tappetino e ho cominciato a pregare...

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Ti immagini che ho visto realizzare la pubblicità dal vivo? Mi hanno portato via inticcherito come il povero Piergiorgio Welby

Macsi

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...sebrano i commenti delle detenute, durante l'ora d'aria di reparto trans...:)

Anonimo ha detto...

A parte che io Mister C nn riesco a vederlo qui...

cmq...


che dire...


STO PACCONE IN PRIMO PIANO E' DESTABILIZZANTE

Anonimo ha detto...

perchè su di me non fanno lo stesso effetto?

dario

Enrico* ha detto...

Concordo con Gipris... Mister C non lo vedo nella foto di Insy e poi dovevi avvertire che aprendo la foto ti si piazzava davanti agli occhi sto pacco! In piccolo fa meno effetto... E chi lavora più adesso??
itboy, ma che ci facciamo con quel sito? Non c'è nemmeno una foto negli spogliatoi!!

Anonimo ha detto...

Enrico*, io non volevo farlo, ma mi costringi a darti l'indirizzo del blog di Pitti dedicato all'evento. Adesso sei contento? (se non ricordo male, sul sito di repubblica c'era pure una gallery)

Anonimo ha detto...

per qualche strana ragione il link di prima non funziona. Lo rimetto

Anonimo ha detto...

Su questo set di Flickr c'è pure il cambio da mutande bianche a mutande nere...

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Hai letto cosa scrivono di te in questo forum?
http://www.gayforum.it/viewtopic.php?t=12028

ahahahah!!

Bel blog comunque!

INSY LOAN E LO STATO DELLE COSE ha detto...

grazie della segnalazione Anonimo. francamente mi prendo i complimenti ma non sono d'accordo con le accuse di plagio. sono prontissimo al confronto benche non mi pare che stia rivendicando la traduzione dei papiri del mar morto. riguardo alle censure, si sbaglia di grosso. ho cancellato forse 3 commenti in un anno a causa di espressioni troppo forti in assoluto. E' vero, già tempo fa fui accusato di plagio ma credo di aver già risposto più o meno come ora.
ad ogni modo, pronto alla smentita.-
saluti e baci.

Anonimo ha detto...

Sei più frocio di quanto pensassi,e solo perchè hai citato Fausto Sarli.

Io questa roba qui l'ho vista in tv,era una cosa del genere Pitti uomo,ed era un pò di tempo fà;beh,che dire,boni,anche se mi faceva più sangue la campagna D&G ambientata in una lurida latrina.In ogni caso è da sempre che mi sbatto a dire:"W la mutanda bianca",che fà il pacco bello,ed il culo meglio!
bagley

Enrico* ha detto...

itboy76 io ti amooooooooooo!!
Iniziare una giornata con questo cambio di mutande, fa bene al cuore...
Peccato ce ne sia una sola...
Lo so, sono incontentabile!!

ConsorzioManzetti ha detto...

io li terrei tutti. butterei via soltanto il biondo (che in questa foto che hai messo non c'è per fortuna; in quella del vanity si).

INSY LOAN E LO STATO DELLE COSE ha detto...

CONSORZIO: io ormai sono arrivato a quel punto della vita per cui va bene tutto, biondini compresi.

Anonimo ha detto...

mi deludi...apparte che di faccia il primo e unico che si vede non mi pare il massimo...e poi sei tr assetato!!

Unknown ha detto...

Caro Insy, a giugno se vuoi fare un salto con me nel bakstage a tenermi pannelli riflettenti per foto non hai cge da chiedere ;)

INSY LOAN E LO STATO DELLE COSE ha detto...

MICHELE, ma sono proposte da fare? certo che vengo!

Unknown ha detto...

okei, chiedo un pass per due all'uffucio stampa, ma tu devi farmmi da scerpa...;)

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